


Ain't No Yellow Brick Road

by FivePips



Series: Rock 'n' Pole [24]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Awkwardness, Bad dates, Casual Sex, Dating, Genderqueer Character, Other, Past Substance Abuse, Post-Break Up, Recovery, genderqueer teddy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-08-22
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:27:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 21,802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25861291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FivePips/pseuds/FivePips
Summary: Teddy decides that it's time to get himself together after a few months of being completely and utterly lost. Dating brings its own challenges.
Relationships: Teddy Lupin/Original Character(s)
Series: Rock 'n' Pole [24]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1452979
Comments: 92
Kudos: 31





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This part two of three of Teddy trying to find himself. I should be posting every other day, maybe once a day.
> 
> Jennandblitz did not help me write this one but she did beta it and give pointers on Sirius' ideas and reactions when they're in the story.

“Oh! You could totally do like engagement shoots and stuff like that to work on your portfolio.” Libby snapped her fingers.

“And you could ask local venues if you could shoot bands and shit,” Oliver added before taking a bit of his pizza.

“Don’t you have an Uncle that’s a photographer?” Ainsley asked, pushing her pin straight blonde hair back.

Teddy nodded as he tapped his pen against the notepad in front of him. “I want to do videography though. I’m not sure if any of this will help. Not that I don’t like taking photos but I like the process more of filming and editing.”

It was a little more than a week before Christmas, only a few weeks after Pada’s birthday and Teddy’s choice to hook up with Jordan. Even though that whole situation was more than fraught, he was finally getting his feet under him career wise. After watching the movie for the millionth time with Pada, he realized he could make something like that his career. So, he was applying to the university nearby for their Digital Film and Production degree. When he made the choice a feeling of  _ this is right _ blossomed inside of him. It was as if he had finally awoken his dreams.

He was also trying to be more social, making friends with Libby and a few others from the support group. It was nice to get out and do things not with his parents. Not that he didn’t love his parents, but he wanted to be a regular nineteen year old. Since he felt again like a disappointment, no matter how many times they said otherwise, Teddy was also trying to prove himself even if it was just to himself. Getting drunk and shagging his ex was stupid. Then he made them worry where he was again. It wasn’t like before when he was going off to London, but Teddy could feel something there.

Pada was almost trying too hard to be normal, chattering away and asking too many questions. That was good though because Dad was far too quiet. No doubt in his head about everything, but Pada definitely filled all those silences. Not to mention the constant reaching out via text whenever he was out but in ways that didn’t look like they were checking in:  _ I saw this ad and thought of you. What’s for dinner? Did you enjoy lunch? How was group? How’s your new friends? Bucky wants a walk with you. Can you stop at the store on your way home… you’re coming home soon I assume? _

“Yeah but you like photography too, so it could be a side thing. Or if you do weddings and shit in the future you could do photo and video.” Jake pointed out, bring Teddy back into the conversation.

“Yeah that’s true.” He polished off the rest of his soda. “I have to go, I’m meant to have a family afternoon.”

One of shopping for Christmas gifts with the undercurrent of teeth being pulled. That was mean, but he didn’t know how else to describe where they were right now. It was so strange because they were so happy to get things back on track after Teddy came back. They had soaked up as much family time together as possible, but once he slept with Jordan it was like the illusion of things was shattered. It was as if everyone remembered that Teddy wasn’t really perfect and was still struggling.

“Have fun, Teddy. Let me know if you want that date. She thinks you’re the cutest!” Libby was dead set on getting Teddy to go out with a cousin. He wasn’t interested, but he did wonder if it would help him move on.

“Not going to happen!” Teddy slung his messenger bag over his shoulder before pushing the chair back. “I’ll see you all next week.”

“Christmas party next week!” Ainsley shouted after him as he went for the door.

Teddy nodded, reminding himself he needed to bring something for the small little party they were having at the youth center for the group. It didn’t exactly sound like a party he’d normally enjoy, but it was happening right after the meeting, and was meant to be a healthy, sober place for them to celebrate. That was great, but Teddy thought it might be a little bleak. Though he wasn’t in the Christmas spirit at all.

Another first in four years, being without Jordan over the holiday season. He had gotten so used to having Jordan there with him. They had gone Christmas shopping and went to family parties and spent all their time together. Now Teddy was all by himself, feeling fucking sorry for himself too. He had tried talking things out with Minnie, but he was still clinging on to Jordan. She told him that they should talk, but he wasn’t sure if he could or what he could say… well he knew what he could say because they tackled that. He just wasn’t sure if it would be productive.

They hadn’t spoken since they had slept together that night. It was such a good night and Teddy felt so perfect while they were there together. When he got home that morning, after the awkward run in with his parents, Teddy went up to his room and cried because it felt like losing the relationship all over again. But he felt so amazing that whole time in Jordan’s bed. He wanted to feel like that all the time, but he didn’t know how. He didn’t know if anything was ever going to feel that good.

“Are you okay, piccolino?” Pada’s voice snapped Teddy out of his thoughts as he approached the studio after getting off the bus. He hadn’t even seen his parents waiting for him just outside so they could walk to some shops.

“I’m okay.”

“Did group go well today?” Dad asked, hands in the pockets of his coats.

Teddy nodded. “It was fine and pizza was good. I sent in the rest of the application stuff before I left this morning too -- for school.”

“So proud of you.” Pada hugged them, starting to walk and dragging Teddy along. “You’re going to be amazing at whatever you do, but I’m glad this has sparked that special something in you.”

“Thanks Pada.”

“I’ll act for you.” Pada brushed their hair off of their shoulder.

Teddy snickered, leaning into Pada, hoping they would have a nice evening shopping and nothing came up. He knew his parents were trying their best to keep going and keep trying to make sure that Teddy stayed on track. They loved him. They were there for him. But he still felt like they were filled with concern that he was going to toss it all away and just go back to whatever that was in London. Teddy couldn’t say that he’d never go back to that with certainty. Of course it wasn’t something he wanted to seek out but on the days he was really down. He was trying though.

“I don’t think Teddy needs that, love.” Dad chuckled.

Pada gasped, as if Dad had made the worst possible comment. “How dare, Remus John Lupin-Black. How very dare.”

Teddy rolled his eyes at their antics. “I need to make something to bring to the support group’s party next week.”

“Oh that’s so cute.”

“Cute? It doesn’t seem kind of grim?” Teddy asked as Pada let go of him to stick their hand in Dad’s pocket.

“Why is it grim?”

Teddy shrugged, not sure how to express what he was thinking and worried if he said it out loud it’d sound pretty shit. “I don’t know, it’s like  _ we know you’d rather be getting fucked up but let’s have christmas cookies instead _ .” Teddy bit his lip.

“It sounds nice, but if you’d rather not go then don’t. Do you have to go?” Pada questioned.

“I don’t have to go, but Libby and everyone is going.”

“You should go then, you’re getting on with this group,” Dad spoke up.

Teddy nodded as they went into a charming little shop that Grandma liked. Libby, Ainsley, Oliver, and Jake were all fun to hang out with. At first he was hesitant because they had come from different backgrounds than him and Libby and Jake used more than party drugs and for much longer of a time. Ainsley had a somewhat similar story to Teddy but she had hit a spiral at uni when she was trying to fit in. Oliver used pills to try to keep up with his schoolwork. They were all just trying to get on, and it was nice to have people in his life who understood a different level of fucking up.

“Of course you don’t have to go. Whatever you’re comfortable with.” Pada picked up a fancy looking thing of handmade soap.

“I’ll go, even if it might be grim. Maybe I’ll actually find some Christmas cheer.” Teddy looked at the incense holder with the tiny fairy caved into it.

“Anything we can help to lift your cheer, piccolino?”

Teddy bit his lip and shook his head. “No, I don’t think so.”

“If there is, let us know.”

Teddy agreed before Pada asked Dad a question about a potential gift for Grandma. The only Christmas music Teddy was identifying with this year was songs about loss and broken hearts. Decorations weren’t as shiny and there wasn’t that special anticipation he tended to feel in the air. It was a bit dull, and Teddy wished that heartbreak was easily fixed.

After spending the afternoon shopping for gifts and getting dinner out, Teddy went up to his room to decompress. He threw on Elliot Smith’s Either/Or before sprawling out in his bed. The time for teen angst seemed to be late for him, and he wasn’t a fan. Teddy needed to get over Jordan and move on with his life. Enough was enough. Spending months mourning the relationship was so stupid. Sure it was broken up by the strangest time in his life, but now he needed to fix things.

Glancing over at his phone Teddy left out a groan. He needed to actually speak to Jordan for anything to happen. If they never talked again Teddy wouldn’t be able to move on. Worry made him pause, made him second guess because what if nothing got solved? What if he still loved him and hated him all at once? There was a thought that he was going to be in the perpetual state of longing. But he’d be there if he didn't speak to him either, wouldn’t he?

Finally Teddy snatched up the phone from his nightstand and swiped it open. He went to Jordan’s number and nearly called, but decided to text instead.

_ I think I’m ready to talk _

**Yeah? You sure?**

_ You know I wouldn’t text otherwise _

**Sorry, right. Call?**

_ Can you come over Friday? Pada and Dad are going to some Christmas thing for the charity and I’m free to not go _

**Yeah, I can do that**

_ Good. Just talking. _

**I know, I wasn’t planning otherwise**

_ Good _

**I’m glad you’re ready to talk**

_ Me too. It’ll be good _

**Much needed**

**I’ll let you go**

**Just tell me what time to be over Friday**

_ I will  _

Teddy dropped his phone down next to him. He covered his eyes and took a deep breath. He needed to figure out what to say, what questions he wanted to ask. He also needed to remind himself not to fall into bed with Jordan. That was going to be the hardest part, because god he loved that physical comfort. That was not going to be the purpose of their conversation. They were going to hash things out, and hopefully Teddy would feel somewhat better.

Even though Jordan was coming over just to chat, he decided not to tell his parents. He knew that Pada especially wouldn’t be too happy to have Jordan in the house. So he’d keep it a secret and out of all the ones he had told in the second half of the year this wasn’t too bad.


	2. Chapter 2

Teddy finished baking the cookie bars just as the doorbell rang. It was so strange for Jordan to ring the doorbell after years of just walking in. After years of being basically family. Teddy set the bars to cool out of Bucky’s reach before heading to answer the door. She thought of the first time that Jordan had come over after Dad found them snogging. As she had clambered down the stairs then she had been so nervous about her parents liking him because he felt so important to her. Now he wasn’t her’s.

Bucky was already at the door, his tail whacking against the entryway wall in excitement. Teddy wished she could convey to her dog that they no longer liked Jordan so he shouldn’t want pets from him. But that was not logical so when Teddy opened the door Bucky greeted him with the excitement of a dog separated from his people for months.

“All right, all right, let him through before you slobber all over him.” Teddy tried to get Bucky to move back so Jordan could come all the way inside.

Eventually Bucky let him through, and Teddy tried not to notice how cute he looked with his cheeks all pink from the cold. She turned towards the kitchen, barely greeting him as he hung his coat and kicked off his boots. Snow was falling softly outside, covering everything in powdery white icing sugar. It was perfectly Christmasy but Teddy was feeling like Scrooge. 

“Smells like you’re baking.”

“I have a Christmas thing tomorrow.” Teddy left out the fact that it was for a substance abuse support group at the youth center. Jordan, to her knowledge, had no idea what she had done those months. “I had to make something.”

“Not a chore for you,” Jordan commented as they walked into the kitchen. “Jealous of everyone at the party who gets to have one.” He glanced over to the counter before taking a seat.

“Maybe I’ll give you one if I don’t want to still rip your throat out after we talk.” Teddy pulled the chair back, causing it to scrape against the floor.

Jordan shifted in his seat, nodding. “Where are Remus and Sirius again?”

“At some charity event for something Auntie Lily has her hand in.” Teddy ran a finger over the scuff mark on the table top. She always wondered how it got there. “Speaking of ripping your throat out, huh?”

“More Sirius than Remus.”

Teddy scoffed. “Pada’s just louder, I’d be more afraid of Dad. When he gets mad he’s just as malicious.”

Jordan groaned, putting a hand over his face. “I miss you and your parents and everyone.”

She hadn’t thought about how Jordan had a family with them. How everyone took Jordan in with no question, and now Teddy expected them all to hate Jordan, and for Jordan to just disappear. It couldn’t have been easy for him either. Nor was it fair for Teddy to tell him to fuck off from the only family who ever care for him -- outside of the rocky relationship with Bev. “Yeah, I… I’m sure that they miss you too under everything. You could see them and stuff.”

Jordan shrugged, sticking his hands in the pocket of his sweatshirt The Quibblers sweatshirt, his favorite band. They had gone to two shows together to see them and Teddy had bought that sweatshirt for him on his birthday. “I don’t want to intrude and make you uncomfortable.”

“Yeah, but you’re probably uncomfortable too, right? They became your family and we did everything together.” Teddy gestured vaguely.

“Then I broke your heart.”

The pain twisted in her chest, something that flared up every so often over the last few months. “You did.” She sniffed, hating the tears that were bubbling back up. “But maybe it was inevitable. It’s unrealistic to think that high school couples could last forever.”

“We had all these plans, Teddy.”

“Plans that you thought I was making only because of you, as if I don’t have my own agency to make my own choices.” Teddy pulled a leg up onto the chair, wrapping an arm around it to comfort herself. “I wanted you and I could have figured everything else out with your help but you chose to let me go.”

“I didn’t want to let you go, I want to give you space.”

Teddy rested her forehead on her knee, clenching her hands. “I didn’t want space, Jordan. I wanted you. I wanted to be able to talk through everything. I lost my biggest sounding board because your opinions were important to me.”

“I’m sorry, I thought maybe you needed something else.”

“Then you should have let me decide that. You could have come to me about it without starting off with breaking up.”

“Taking a break.”

“It’s the same fucking thing!” Teddy snapped, looking back up at Jordan, who was sitting there with his shoulders slumped and his head down. “It’s the same damn thing, Jordan. You didn’t want to be together, you didn’t want to be there for me because I was going through a hard time. I was lost and you were the only thing that I knew I wanted.”

Jordan’s face crumpled, shifting in his seat. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for it to be like that. I fucked up.”

“Yeah, you did. You were a shitty fucking boyfriend at that moment. You were about to leave for a three month long holiday and instead of staying with me all night and having a good time together before you left you started on that conversation. I got my heart broken instead and it just piled on top of my existential dread. Not only did I have no fucking clue to where I was going with my life, I lost my best fucking friend and the person who I thought was the love of my life.” Teddy hated her voice cracking. She wanted to be strong and not fall apart, but the hurt was clawing at the back of her throat.

“I know I can’t say anything to change all that, Teddy, I wish I could but I can’t. You are your own person, and you can make your own choices. I was the fucking idiot and I know I was. I spent four months wondering if I made the right choice and I thought I did because you were out with your new mates having fun.”

She took a breath that made a strange noise, like a disbelieving laugh, forgetting that Jordan was still following her on her social media. “I was just trying to make myself feel better. It was shit, just like I hope your holiday was. I spent four months completely lost and I had no one to talk to. Those people weren’t friends and I don’t even speak to them now. I couldn’t even talk to my parents then because we were arguing.” Christ, she didn’t want to get into this, but maybe she should tell him what happened.

Jordan furrowed his brow. “ _ You _ were arguing with your parents?”

“Yeah. I had a complete upheaval in my life. All my best friends were gone. My boyfriend was now my ex who was a fucking idiot. I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life. It was worse than whatever teen angst bullshit I had when I was like thirteen. We were -- it was terrible and we’re still not back to how things were. It wasn’t just… it’s not all your fault, but things happened and I did some stupid shit because I was lost.” Teddy rubbed her hand over her eyes, trying to stop any tears from streaming down her face.

“I didn’t mean to--”

“It’s not all because of you, Jordan. It’s -- it was fucking everything.” She leaned against the wall behind her chair. “It was all shit and maybe I needed to go through it, but it fucking sucked. I hated it and I’m still cleaning up after myself. But I’m doing it on my own and I don’t need you anymore.” The last sentence tumbled out of her mouth before she had any real chance to think about it. But now she was on a roll. “I don’t need you to hold my hand all the time like I thought I did. I’m doing okay without you so you can go up to Scotland and be happy at school because I know you needed to come and beg for forgiveness before you went off. You just needed to make yourself feel better. So please feel better and go do what you need to do.”

Jordan shook his head, brow furrowed. “That’s not true, Teddy. I came because I still love you. I’ve wanted to talk to you since before I decided to go to St Andrews because I still love you.”

“Well, I don’t want to love you any longer. I want you to go up and study and become some famous scientist without me holding you back because that’s what I was going to do before, wasn’t it. You’d worry I’d stay with you and we would end up in London at a school you didn’t really want to go to. So you’re free. Have fun.”

Jordan opened and closed his mouth, tears streaming down his cheeks. “I would have been more than happy to go to London with you or stay here and go to Hogwarts and live in a tiny studio apartment with you like we talked about. I would have been happy because I was with you.”

“How can you feel that way about yourself but not trust me?” She made a frustrated noise. “You’re such a fucking idiot.”

“I know I am, Teddy! God, I don’t know what you want me to do to show you I’m sorry. I’ll get on my knees and fuckig worship you and beg for forgiveness if it meant that you would love me again.”

Teddy blinked a few times because she had never heard Jordan raise his voice, no matter what they had fought about before. “No! You can’t fucking do that to change what you did.  _ Let’s turn Teddy’s life upside down a little more by fucking taking a break _ . God, why didn’t you think? You’re fucking brilliant and you didn’t think that it would hurt?”

“Of course I knew it would hurt! I hurt myself! I didn’t want -- I didn’t want us hurt when you realized you -- I don’t know…” He trailed off, hands going to his face.

“You’re dumb. You’re a fucking idiot. I wanted everything with you. Fucking everything. I wanted to ask you to marry me and I wanted to experience all of life and you…” Teddy shook her head. “And you shattered it all.”

“I’m sorry. I love you -- you wanted to marry me?” Jordan sniffled, wiping his cheeks again.

“Yeah, of course.” She looked down at her hands, not wanting to soften just because he was crying and not just because they were talking about the future they weren’t going to have. “I thought you were what I wanted.”

“You  _ are _ what I want.”

Teddy laughed. “You had a hell of a way of showing it.” Teddy scrubbed a hand through her curls. All she wanted to do was crawl into Jordans lap, and let him kiss her better. She wanted everything to just be better, but it couldn’t because it hurt, and it felt like it was going to hurt for a while. “So, we’re over and you’re going to go live your best life at uni.”

“And you’re going to…”

“Do the same thing.” Teddy dropped her leg, her heart rate coming down. Something felt like it finally broke inside of her. Like she was finally letting go of something she couldn’t quite put a finger on. She wasn’t over Jordan, but it felt so good to get it all out.

“You’re going to uni?”

“Yeah, Hogwarts for Digital Film and Production.” She scraped her teeth over her bottom lip, rubbing her eye.

Jordan lit up, as if they were still together and it actually mattered to him. “Yeah? That’s amazing. You always did so well at that stuff.”

Teddy looked down at her fingernails. They were chewed to hell, as they had been recently. “I’m excited to get started. I mean, I don’t know if I’ll get in, so I shouldn’t say I’m going yet.”

“Please, Teddy, you’re  _ so _ smart.” Jordan shook his head.

She laughed, standing up to get a cookie bar for Jordan. Maybe he did deserve it a little after Teddy unloaded all of that. She had never said it out loud to anyone that she wanted to marry Jordan. It was always a given when they were together, Teddy assumed, because they were so close. Now they were nothing. They were just co-existing and soon Jordan would go off and exist elsewhere while Teddy existed in Godric’s still. That was probably for the best.

Everything still hurt, but Teddy decided that she finally got everything out so she was going to try to move on. She didn’t need to hang on to all her hurt, and she could let herself feel when she needed to feel. Bottling it all up wasn’t helpful at all, obviously. One day they might be able to be friends again and one day Teddy might not feel that hollow feeling in the center of her chest when she thought of Jordan, but for now at least she didn’t feel as if she was about to burst.

“That was a good cookie bar.” Jordan smiled at her as they started to walk to the door, lingering between the kitchen and the living room for a moment.

“I’m glad you liked it.”

“I’m glad I got that instead of my throat ripped out.”

“I think you got both.” Teddy snickered, running a hand through her curls.

“So… I’ll go?”

“Yeah.” She nodded, and without much thought went in for a hug. It just felt right because they always hugged and touched and kissed.

And kissed.

Yeah. She did that too when their faces lingered a bit too close.

And kissed.

And kissed.

“Let’s go upstairs.”


	3. Chapter 3

Teddy was still panting as she sat up in bed.  _ Oh that was a mistake _ , she thought when she glanced over at Jordan tossing the condom away. After managing to have a conversation, albeit a tense one, Teddy had felt as if everything was back on track. Things were going to be better in terms of not wanting to scream at Jordan when she saw him. They could just exist.

Existing meant falling into bed with one another apparently. Fucking hell they had great sex though. He knew exactly how to treat Teddy, especially when her body didn’t quite fit how she felt on the inside. They both learned together how to manage that, and the idea of explaining what she wanted or needed to another person was exhausting. But she’d manage it eventually.

“I’m sorry,” Jordan mumbled as he fell back into bed.

“For what? It’s not like either of us were unwilling participants. We just, we probably shouldn’t keep doing this if we are going to actually put effort into moving on.” That nearly hurt to suggest because she didn’t want to stop.

Jordan nodded. “We do because I still love you and you want nothing to do with me. Which I understand, I don’t mean to hold that over your head or anything. It’s that I can’t keep sleeping with you because I’ll never move on.”

“I get it. I got magic genitals,” she managed to make a joke but the tone of her voice made it fall flat.

He still laughed, rolling over onto his side. Teddy looked up at him, biting her lip. Never sleeping with Jordan again was... it was strange to think about. Teddy was content for a long time that he’d be the only person she’d be with. Now she’d shagged a near unknown amount of people — well it was a known amount but it made her ill to think about. Not that it mattered, she was sex positive and grew up in a sex positive environment but it still weighed in her. But so didn’t all those dumb choices these few months.

“You okay?” Jordan frowned, carding his fingers through her curls.

“Yeah, just thinking.” She pushed herself to sit up again.

“I’d ask what but I lost that privilege.”

“Yeah, you did.” She looked up at him for a moment, seeing the pain play across his normally soft, sweet features. When she couldn’t take it anymore she stood up, going over to where she had kicked off her underwear and leggings.

“It’s weird seeing you with your natural hair color.” Jordan smiled.

Teddy laughed as she pulled her bottoms on, not wanting to be naked while she was feeling vulnerable. “Yeah, you never saw my natural color… well you did but not on my head,” she mused as she reached for her phone in the pile of clothes.

There was a text from Pada about twenty minutes ago.  **On our way 💚.** Teddy’s eyes widened before scrambling to throw Jordan’s clothes at him. They didn’t even know Jordan was coming over to talk. “My parents are going to be home any minute.”

It seemed to take a moment for the realization to dawn in him what it meant. In the past it really didn’t matter, unless they were breaking the door open rule but even then it wasn’t too big of a deal. Teddy didn’t want them to know she slept with Jordan again. They were no doubt going to worry about a spiral or something. Pada was going to be pissed at Jordan. Dad was probably going to do his usual silent brooding like some Austen character. It was just going to be bad. Full stop.

Teddy threw on a t-shirt as Jordan basically hopped into his pants then his jeans — nearly stepping through the hole in the knee and making a bigger rip. His socks were in his hands as he struggled into his shirt.

“Where is my sweatshirt?” His voice was muffled by the bunched up fabric around his face. If Teddy wasn’t so stressed it would have been fucking hilarious.

“I don’t know!” Teddy pushed him out of her door and Jordan blindly made it for the stairs, but they were too late.

At the bottom of the stairs was Pada in their typical confuse-the-straights look with trousers and a blouse and brogues, holding up Jordan’s sweatshirt, looking like they were going to tear Jordan’s throat out. Dad stood next to them, his suit jacket over his arm and his glasses pushed on to the top of his head. Of course his face was unreadable as Jordan managed to finally right his shirt.

“Shit,” Teddy whispered. “You’re home early.”

“Clearly you were too busy to see our text.” Pada raised an eyebrow as Jordan took a fortifying breath to walk down the stairs. Teddy wanted to make him do this alone, but there was no running from it.

“Ah, yeah. Jordan is heading home. We talked.”

“Talked, yeah?” Dad asked when Jordan came to the last step, Teddy trailing two behind him.

“I’m sorry,” Jordan looked between the three Lupin-Blacks.

“I’ll walk you out.” Pada shoved the sweatshirt towards Jordan and gestured to the door.

Teddy looked down at her feet. For so long she never really fucked up in her parents eyes. She had always been a good kid for them. Now it seemed she just couldn’t stop being messy.

“Tea?” Dad asked but was already walking away before Teddy could answer.

Jordan gave her a sympathetic look before trailing after Pada towards the door. She felt torn for a moment between listening in on what Pada said, following Dad, and just going to bed. She knew they’d just knock on her door to talk and listening would probably make things worse, so she followed her Dad.

The suit jacket was already over the chair and he was filling the kettle when Teddy walked in. He didn’t even glance up when she sat down in her usual seat. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m not sure why.” Dad was as stony as ever. “You’re an adult and you’re making your own choices. Are you two back together?”

Teddy shook her head.

Remus plonked three mugs down on the counter before opening their tea drawer. “Good talk?”

“Yeah.” She shifted in her seat as she tried to think of something good to say. Her mind was caught up on what Pada was saying to Jordan. It felt like it had been a while now.

The silence settled in between them and all Teddy could hear was Pada’s muffled voice. Nothing was clear of what they were saying to Jordan. She felt only a little bad subjecting him to that, but she also thought it was at least a little deserved.

Pada came back through as the kettle boiled. Dad still was at the counter. Silent. She scrubbed her fingers through her hair, groaning a little as Pada took a seat. They didn’t say anything, and Teddy was almost missing their inane chatter. At least them talking and filling in the silences was normal. This felt Bad.

No one spoke as Dad set the tea down in front of them. He stayed standing by the counter after, arms crossed as Pada looked down at their mug. “Anything we need to know?” They finally asked but it still took Teddy by surprise.

“We used protection,” Teddy blurted.

Pada’s eyebrows went up. “Well that’s good. Did he break your heart again? Are you back together… or is this something in between?”

Teddy put her hands around the mug, letting the heat seep through to her finger tips, making them tingle. “In between? I don’t know. We’re existing.”

“Existing,” Dad repeated.

She nodded. “He’s off to Scotland, so soon you won’t have to worry.”

“What are your Dad and I going to be worried about? He hurts you again then I’m taking Dad up on his arson offer finally.”

She groaned, setting the mug down before putting her head in her hands. “It’s — I’m fine. I’m the one who wanted this both times. He’s made it perfectly clear he fucked up and he still loves me.”

“Well that’s good then.” Dad cleared his throat and Pada shot him a look.

“If he still loved you he’d care more than just let you get yourself hurt.”

“Let me get myself hurt?” Teddy repeated. “How? I’m not hurting from this.”

Dad nodded before picking up his mug. “Good, I trust you.”

It didn’t feel like he did.

“I’m off to bed.” He came over to the table to grab his jacket.

“Yeah, you don’t look hurt at all. None of your actions over the last six months convey any hurt.” Pada looked as if they were fighting off rolling their eyes.

“I’m not hurt now!” Teddy snapped and Dad stopped moving towards the stairs. “I’m not hurt from sleeping with him. I feel the same. That’s not fair, Pada.”

“Okay piccolina, whatever you say.”

It didn’t feel okay. “What’d you say to Jordan?”

Dad made his way back to the table. “We’re not going to glaze over the fact that you just shouted at Pada, are we?”

“I’m sorry.” She grimaced.

“Don’t worry, piccolina, I just walked him to the door and told him to drive safe.” They stood up and put a hand on Dad’s arm. “Come on, caro.”

“You talked to him for a while.”

“Did I?” Pada frowned, picking up their mug. “Just telling him to drive safe in the snow. Have a good night's sleep.”

“I know you said something else to him.”

“Don’t forget to turn the lights off, piccolina.” They smiled at her before going to the stairs with Dad.

Teddy watched them leave the room, completely dumbfounded. She didn’t understand why they were acting as if she was stupid or couldn’t handle the truth. With a huff, she headed up the stairs because it didn’t seem fair for them to leave her out of the loop. It was her life, she should know what they said to Jordan.

After a knock on the door, Pada opened it seemingly unsurprised. Before either of them could speak, Dad called from somewhere in their room, “Have you calmed down enough to have an adult conversation?”

“What?” Teddy furrowed her brow. “What did you say? Why won’t you tell me?”

Pada leaned against the door, resting their hip on the frame. “If you’re sure you need to know, then fine. I told him to buck up and that if he hurts you, regardless of whether you put yourself in a position to be hurt, he’ll have to deal with me.”

She put her hands over her eyes. “Pada, he’s been straightforward about everything.”

“I’m glad he has. It doesn’t stop me talking to him though, and making sure he knows how everyone in the situation feels.”

“Everyone in the situation…” Teddy trailed off, shaking her head. “Okay, fine.”

“Yeah, piccolina, everyone in this situation because your Dad and I have been in it too. Not to mention Auntie Mary, Uncle Peter, Ro, Luna. So if you think you’re alone, and you get to make any choice you like just because you’re single that’s not true. We’re here to help you and I for one am done sitting on the side and letting my child get hurt, and yes, you’re still my child. You’ll be forty and still my child.”

She bit her cheek. “Okay. Sorry. Good night.” Teddy nodded before turning around and going back for the stairs. 

Before she could move away, Pada pulled her in for a hug. She barely hugged back, not sure what to say because it just was all wrong. She understood that people were hurt, but she also didn’t think that sleeping with him now should have been a big deal. No one would have had any clue if Teddy had got Jordan out before her parents came home.

“See you tomorrow. Get some rest.” Pada kissed their forehead before letting her go.

Teddy nodded before going downstairs to turn the lights off.


	4. Chapter 4

Laying in bed the next morning, Teddy buried her face in the pillow next to her. It still smelled like Jordan, making her heart ache for just a moment. It didn’t linger as it usually did, and she was sure that it had something to do with that cathartic unloading last night. Now she was more stressed about Dad and Pada and everyone else in the family. Sex shouldn’t have been a big deal because sex wasn’t a big deal. At least she knew Jordan and was being safe. God, she was so fucking stupid.

“Teddy, we’re making breakfast.” Dad’s voice startled them from the other side of her door.

“Yep.” She laid out starfished in the middle of her bed for a moment, thinking about just sleeping through breakfast. Or “sleeping through” aka laying in bed with her phone doing the endless scroll. It seemed like a good idea to stay in her bed all wrapped up in her blankets trying to get her mind around everything.

When Pada called up to her, she dragged herself out of bed, pulling on her closest sweatshirt. She didn’t know why they were making her have breakfast with them because it was just going to end up stilted because that was it was like recently and she had made it worse once again. She wanted those few weeks back when everything was just perfect with them. Where they were just family and Teddy was fixing things.

Downstairs, Dad was scooping eggs out onto plates and Pada was sipping coffee. “Nice of you to join us.” Dad glanced over his shoulder.

“Didn’t know we were doing breakfast.” She took a plate from the counter before going to take a seat.

Dad nodded before joining them at the table. “Last minute idea.”

“Mmm.” Teddy stabbed her fork into a sausage. “I won’t be home for dinner, I have group then I’m getting pizza for dinner and going to the market since we’re getting out a little later.”

“After we should do a movie night,” Pada suggested.

“I don’t know. I think I’m going to read. I’m in the middle of a good book.” Teddy bit her lip, staring at her plate.

Dad picked up his mug. “We could do a reading night. Listen to some music and eat some snacks. We could make a cheese board, that was good last time we did that.”

Teddy shrugged. “Reading together isn’t going to fix whatever the hell is going on here.”

“Teddy Lyall, maybe you need to check your attitude and things will get better. There’s nothing we wouldn’t do for you, and we’re just trying to help you. You’re doing so well, and we’re fucking proud. We’re -- I’m just upset with your attitude right now.”

“You’ve both been acting this way with me since I slept with Jordan a few weeks back.” She threw her hands out.

Pada cleared their throat. “We’re worried about you. You know how I feel about sex, but you also have to realize the emotional toll that this is having on you. You’re so closed off, and I think that you’re projecting your own hurt on to us. I don’t have a problem with you using sex to numb whatever this is -- it’s a damn sight better than coke, but what now? Are you just going to keep sleeping with Jordan instead of talking about your feelings? What are you going to do when he’s gone? Find someone else?”

Teddy put her head in her hands. “I’m not -- I’m not -- I talked to him and dealt with my feelings for him.”

“It’s not just your feelings for him, Teddy.”

“I talk to Minnie and the group. I talk about my feelings plenty. I’m in a better space. I slept with him  _ twice _ . One time I did feel stupidly lonely but last night I just wanted to.” Teddy sniffled, rubbing her eyes.

“Dealt with your feelings? I’m not sure if it’s because I’ve been in a relationship with your dad for twenty years, but if I want to bang someone someone it’s probably because I feel something towards something. You’re getting upset with it, talk to me, piccolina, what are you thinking?”

Teddy made a frustrated noise, pressing her palms against her eyes. “I’m thinking that I can feel nothing and want to sleep with someone else because I just want to sleep with them.”

“Okay.” Dad pushed the bottle of orange juice towards Teddy. “Have something to drink.”

“I’m going up to my room.” Teddy stood up. “I’m sorry.”

“Teddy, stay.”

“Dad,” she started to speak but she didn’t know where she was going with it.

“We can ban big talk from the breakfast table,” Pada said before they tucked into their breakfast finally.

“It’s not the talk, it’s that I don’t know what you want from me.”

“We don’t want anything from you, annwyl.” Dad shook his head as Teddy picked up her plate.

“We just want you to be happy.”

“I’m trying to be.” She looked down at her food. “I’m trying to be happy. I’ll get over him.”

Dad’s brow pinched. “Can I ask you something?”

She nodded.

“If you love him and he loves you why aren’t you trying to work on it?”

Teddy shook her head because she didn’t know how to answer that. They seemed to hate Jordan and now they wanted her back with him? “Because he broke up with me,” she said flatly. “He hurt me.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?” She laughed. “What?”

“Okay, that’s all I wanted to know, Teddy. I’m just trying to understand.” Dad shrugged.

Teddy took her plate and utensils, going back up to her room without saying anything else. Going through usual teenage bullshit late was worse than it was at the usual time. But she was a Lupin-Black, did she do anything usual or expected? No. She also was a stubborn idiot sometimes. Was she just being stubborn with Jordan or did she really not want him anymore — really not want him and not just saying it because she was angry.

Sitting down at her desk with her food, Teddy looked out her window. The snow was sparkling now even on a cloudy mid morning. Her eggs were cold already, and nothing looked good. Everything was just off, and she wasn’t looking forward to doing anything at all today. But she had to get to group because she tended to feel better after going even if it was a slog beforehand. Plus, going out with her new friends was better than being stuck inside being weird with her parents.

Group went well. Teddy talked about struggling with her parents right now, but how she had finally talked to Jordan. Granted she left out shagging him, but still. That was something she’d talk about one-on-one with Minnie or her drug counselor at the very most. It was productive that they talked, and Teddy really didn’t understand the big fucking deal that Pada and Dad were making out of them shagging. Like Pada said it could have been a hell of a lot worse and she could have been doing coke again.

After group, the little Christmas party after wasn’t terrible. There was a lot of food and alcohol free eggnog, which was still good. She ate far too much food that she was sure she was going to burst. She also got a cute little keychain as a prize for winning trivia, which she did her best not to gloat about but she was so competitive. Oliver told her she looked murderous when she had got one question wrong. It wasn’t her fault that she liked to be right and win.

When they finished up the party, they headed over to the Christmas market. Walking after all that good food was a good choice, as was hanging out with the group. It was nice to hang out with friends after the last day -- well less than. Sure her friends were home from uni, but she didn’t want to see anyone. They’d all be chatting about how brilliant it was, while Teddy had just gone through the worst few months of her life. With Oliver, Libby, and Ainsley she didn’t have to lie about what she had done.

They were so full even after wandering around the marketplace, they decided against pizza. She didn’t want to go home, but everyone else was busy doing other things. Families were all together. She couldn’t see Jordan because they were trying not to hook up. Dad and Pada were annoyed enough with her anyhow.

Walking in the door she found Pada and Dad in the living room with a bottle of wine and a cheese board on the table. They were cuddled up on the sofa together with books in each of their hands. The Christmas lights on the tree and around the windows were giving everything a soft glow. It was almost too intimate for Teddy, it made her want to turn and head right for the stairs. In the background there was a jazz album playing that Teddy didn’t recognize.

“Hi Teddy.” Dad held his book to the side. “How was group?”

“Fine. The party was less grim than I thought.” She bit her lip. “I see you decided to do a book night.”

“Yeah, you could come join still, piccolina.” Pada shifted to sit up, leaning forward.

“You two seem like you’re having a nice date.” Teddy waved a hand. “I’ll just make some tea and leave you be.”

“We won’t sit and cuddle the whole time. You and Dad can have some swotty book chats.” Pada looked at her with wide eyes.

Teddy shook her head. “Nah, thanks though Pada.”

Dad reached up to rub Pada’s back. “All right, we’re down here if you change your mind.”

With a nod, Teddy headed into the kitchen to make tea before going up to her room to read alone.


	5. Chapter 5

Recovery was packed with their found family and friends for New Years Eve. As usual everyone was having a great time and everyone seemed to have someone with them that they love. Except Jordan. Yes, he was there with Bev because Auntie Mary and Uncle Peter insisted. Teddy wanted to protest, but he knew that it wasn’t fair to keep Jordan out of the family he had been in for four years. Auntie Mary and Uncle Peter helped him for so long and Luna was basically his sister, Roro a little less so since she was mostly away at uni.

The time following Teddy sleeping with Jordan right through New Year had been just okay. Teddy did his best to put a smile on and enjoy the holiday. Dad and Pada were trying too, but it still felt off. The house was full Christmas Eve with Uncle Reg and his family and Grandma and Grandpa, so at least Teddy had some distraction then. Christmas Day he was over Gran and Gramps, and it was mad as always. It was all the time in between that everything felt a bit fraught.

“Stop thinking too much, Teddy, have a bit of fun.” Ro came to stand next to him as he watched Neville and Harry vs Luna and Hettie at beer pong.

“Sorry if I’m thinking too loudly.” Teddy snorted a laugh into his pint glass.

“Yes, it’s really bothersome.” She nudged him as Harry jumped up and down waving his arms around because Luna apparently broke a rule. Luna didn’t seem to care as much. Neville was too busy laughing while Hettie rolled her eyes. “Nearly midnight. Any plans?”

“Try not to fuck up this year. I think if I stay away from cocaine and unprotected sex then I should be okay.”

She hummed, and Teddy had been hoping for a laugh. “I think you’re going to take more than that, Teddy. Not that I want you to do those things, please don’t.”

Teddy nodded but frowned. “I won’t. What else do I need to do?”

“Discover yourself. Actually work on things. Talk about things.”

What was with everyone telling him to talk about things? Did he do that already? He actively did it weekly, most of the time twice a week depending. “I’m trying.”

“Keep trying.” She smiled as Sal came over, wrapping his arms around her middle.

Teddy caught Jordan’s eye where he was standing by the bar. Uncle Reggie had just been chatting with him, but now he was alone and looking awkward. It was the first time he had been around everyone since leaving and breaking up with Teddy. As much as Teddy felt alone, he couldn’t imagine how Jordan was feeling. 

Maybe they needed to talk more, like Ro had suggested. Or maybe Teddy could do with one more shag before Jordan left for uni. That way neither of them would be lonely tonight. He excused himself from conversation with Ro and Sal as he watched Jordan slip outside. Gone for a cigarette no doubt, Teddy figured. 

The cold air was absolutely biting as he stepped out the door. Teddy was glad to see Jordan getting into his car instead of standing outside to smoke because he was just in his T-shirt. He slid into the passenger seat just as Jordan turned the car on.

“Fucking hell, Teddy, you scared the shit out of me.” Jordan managed to say after jumping in his seat.

“Sorry, I wanted to talk to you.” Teddy watched him fish out his cigarettes. “If I did it in there everyone would look.”

“And no one is going to question why you followed me out or why we walked back in together.” Jordan slid the cigarette between his lips before pulling out his lighter.

“At least no one is staring as we talk.” He looked towards the large windows of Recovery. Dad and Pada were dancing around the middle of the dance floor, too busy to notice where he had gone. “Let’s take a drive.”

“Teddy,” he said as the smoke curled out of the side of his mouth.

“Jor.” He pouted just a little. “One last time.”

“No. I respect you.”

Teddy let out a laugh, turning in the passenger seat towards him. “What?”

“I respect you and I’m not gonna sleep with you right now.”

“Fuck, Jordan, you can respect me and let me suck your dick.” He reached for the cigarette. “Pada scared you?”

“We said we wouldn’t do it anymore if we wanted to move on from one another.”

Teddy rolled his eyes, taking a drag. “Look, one last final screw. This time we know it’s the last one so we can just do everything. We have a few hours if we go back to mine now.” He handed the cigarette back over.

“No.” Jordan was firm.

“What the fuck did Pada say to you?” He demanded, leaning his head back against the frosty window.

Flicking the ash out the small crack in the window Jordan shook his head. “I’m not saying.”

He threw his hands up. “Why not?”

“I don’t fancy being gutted by Sirius and have Remus burn down my mum’s house.”

“ _ Jor _ ,” he whined. “They won’t. They’re bluffing.”

“Look you get to have this great big extended family. I have one aunt, her snobby kid, and a shitty uncle. My relationship with my mum is rocky at best and I never want to speak to my father again. I’d like to have some other people in my corner, and I’m not throwing it away for a shag.” Jordan didn’t look at him as he spoke.

Teddy shook her head. “Why would they disown you if they haven’t yet?”

“Because if I give in to another pity shag to make you feel better then I’m afraid Sirius is going to not let me be around.”

“That’s bullshit!” Teddy couldn’t believe that Jordan would think that. “They can’t do th — pity shag?”

“I’m sorry. I love you and I’m not going to do this again unless you want to be with me. I’ll be here for you to talk, but I’m not going to have sex with you.”

Teddy bit his lip. “Can you drive me home?”

“I’m not gonna—“

“I know,” he cut Jordan off. He just couldn’t stand to be at the party. What was the point if he didn’t have someone to kiss at midnight? Teddy also was annoyed that Pada was the one to probably call it a pity shag, probably made Jordan so worried. “I just want to go home. Drop me off out front and don’t even get out of the car.”

“Okay.” He put his seat belt on. “Are you sure you don’t want to stay?”

Teddy shook his head. “Not particularly. I’ll text Dad saying I don’t feel well and you’re bringing me home and that’s all.”

Jordan started to drive as Teddy sent Dad a message. “You love New Years.”

“I love champagne and midnight kisses. I probably shouldn’t drink a lot of champagne and I know I’m not getting any kisses.” Teddy wished that he was getting stupidly high in London for a moment. The thought made him clench his jaw and shift in his seat.

“All right?”

“No.”

“I’m sorry Teddy.”

“It’s not always you, Jordan.” He shook his head.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.” 

As Jordan fell silent, Dad replied to his message about going home.

**_Are you okay annwyl?_ **

_ I’m not shagging Jordan _

**_Not what I asked_ **

_ I’m upset _

_ I just want to be in bed _

Teddy paused in typing for a moment, thinking about if he should say what he was actually thinking.

_ But I also want to be down in London _

_ And I don’t know why I feel like that suddenly _

**_I’m coming home_ **

_ You have the party  _

**_With plenty capable people_ **

_ Enjoy your night, Dad _

**_I’ll be home in a few minutes_ **

**_Pada too_ **

_ I’m upset with them _

**_They still want to to come home_ **

_ Okay _

Even though he was annoyed, there was no stopping Pada. No one could ever tell them what to do once they were set on something. Hopefully they’d just come home and let Dad come cuddle him without any attempts at talking.

When they got home Teddy got out of the car without saying goodbye to Jordan. He knew he should have told him he’d miss him and to have fun at uni, but he was just so over it. Instead he went inside and straight up to his room with that hollow ache in his chest and an itching for  _ something _ deep in his bones.

Not long after he had changed into his sweatpants, the sound of car doors closing then moments after the front door opening let Teddy know his parents were home. He sat on the edge of his bed as he listened to muffled voices then only one set of footsteps on the stairs. Thankfully they belonged to Dad as he appeared in the doorway.

“Do you want to talk about it, annwyl?” Dad took a seat next to him on the bed.

“Yeah… I don’t know… I just feel empty.” Teddy put his head on Dad’s shoulder. “And I hate it and I’m angry with Pada.”

Dad wrapped his arms around him, and Teddy closed his eyes, trying to pretend for a moment he was just little again. “I understand, it’s hard going through a breakup. You didn’t get to move on properly because of everything and now it’s all mucked up.”

“Pada told Jor not to pity shag me.”

“I know.”

Teddy looked up at him with a creased brow. “Why do they have to interfere?” His voice cracked. “It’s not fair, I’m an adult.”

“You are an adult, but your actions still have consequences. It could still hurt Jordan and the whole family even if it doesn’t seem like it will now.” Dad rubbed his back. “It’s complicated and I know you’re hurting. Thank you for telling me you wanted to go to London.”

Teddy sniffled, squeezing his eyes shut. “Why don’t I feel better?”

“It’s a process.” Dad held him a little tighter. “You’re not magically going to suddenly feel better about everything. Your first breakup was following a four year relationship that you thought was going to last forever. Even if you’re on your way to settling into something you want to do as a career it’s still rocky and scary. All your relationships are a little bit different now. You want to feel better and you remember whatever it was you felt with drugs making you feel good or how Jordan makes you feel. Masking that isn’t going to change it, annwyl, you’re going to feel worse in the end so you need to face it and you can because you’re strong.”

Teddy couldn’t reply because he was now sobbing into his dad’s shoulder. Everything was different and Teddy hated it. All of his friends had stories that didn’t involve him. Some people hadn’t even texted since they came back from uni -- not his family, but the mates he met during school. His family was changing and everyone most likely looked at him differently now. His parents thought he was getting pity shags and doing his best not to snort coke. Granted that wasn’t that far off, was it? It just was strange to realize people saw him that way.

“I’m sorry.”

“You’re all right Teddy.” Dad hugged him tighter.

“You can go back to the party.”

“Don’t be daft, you need support right now.”

Teddy wiped his eyes. “I’m just going to go to sleep.”

“And I’ll be here to rub your back.” Dad insisted.

“Yeah.” He shuffled away to get under the covers. It was then he saw Pada in the doorway. He hated how angry he felt with them, even though they were looking out for Teddy. It was just a shitty feeling that they didn’t trust Teddy to make his own choices now, to make his own mistakes.

“We’re both here for you, piccolino.”

Teddy got under his covers and pulled them over his head, not answering.


	6. Chapter 6

When Teddy woke up, she found Dad snoring next to her in the same clothes he had gone to the party in. It didn’t seem to be too late, looking outside, but it was snowing again and looking grim. Teddy was fuzzy and warm, that hollow feeling in her chest still.  _ Happy New Year _ , Teddy thought to herself as she shuffled so the wall was against her back. It was grounding and solid. This wasn’t how she wanted her New Year's morning to be -- waking up with her dad in her bed because he was probably scared she’d slip out in the middle of the night to go to London.

“Shit, sorry, annwyl.” Dad yawned, shuffling to sit up. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”

“It’s okay.” Teddy bit her lip as he sat up, rubbing his eyes. 

“Are you okay?”

Teddy nodded, closing her eyes again. “I didn’t mean to make you worried last night.”

“You know it’s good to tell one of us or someone when you’re struggling.” Dad ruffled her curls. “It doesn’t matter when it is, if you need help, we’re here.”

“And Pada can tell someone not to shag me on penalty of death.” Teddy shoved her face into the pillow.

“I can’t speak for them, so I won’t. You two need to talk about it, but they love you and would do anything for you.”

She groaned, rolling back over. “So much talking.”

“I know, it’s hard.” Dad stood up, stretching out as his body cracked and popped. “I’d love for you to go down and chat with them if you’re up for it. Maybe you can try to understand where they were coming from instead of stewing in anger?”

Teddy kicked her legs up to untangle herself from the duvet. She didn’t want to, but she needed to try. If she didn’t then things would be tense for god knows how long, and things would just get worse and she didn’t want to have any big arguments like they had before. “Fine.”

Dad let out a laugh before heading for the door. “I’ll be down in a minute.”

Teddy rubbed her face before getting out of bed. The smell of coffee hit her before she even got halfway down the stairs. In the kitchen, Pada was at their computer with their largest mug of coffee in front of them. “Morning, piccolino. How are you?”

“Piccolina, Ah, morning. I’m okay.” She went over to the coffee maker.

“Look, I’m sorry that I got involved. I want you to make your own choices but it’s hard when I can see your actions hurting you.”

Teddy pulled out her iridescent rainbow mug, biting her lip trying to think about what to say in return. “I thought I could make mistakes. I talked to Jordan the other week and it was a long conversation. It’s not like we just shagged then. It’s not hurting me.”

Pada shut their laptop with a snap. “It feels like it’s hurting you. You can make mistakes Teddy, and I’m always going to be here, but it’s just so hard to see you make these decisions. I want you to respect yourself, piccolina.”

“Why can’t I respect myself when I’m sleeping with someone? How do you know it hurt me when I slept with him? I know you’re here for me, but you don’t have to step in to talk to Jordan.” She poured her coffee.

“What makes you think that I was talking to Jordan for you?”

She frowned, taking her coffee with her to the table. “I…”

“I was talking to him for my own sake, not yours. And because I’m your parent, Teddy. I thought I knew you quite well, and I can see when you’re not okay. You have Grandma’s intuition but I’m not blind.”

Teddy sank into her seat, rubbing her eyes again. She was hurting, but she still didn’t think that it had anything to do with sleeping with Jordan.  _ Not _ sleeping with Jordan last night made her more upset than sleeping with him would have. Okay, so maybe not sleeping with Jordan wasn’t the issue. Shit, Pada was right, she was just using things to numb her feelings. She hated when they were right. “I know, Pada.”

“I’m not trying to interfere and make things worse for you. Just like I have been for these last few months, I want you to be better and okay and loved. I’ll step back so you can do what you need to do, but I’ll be here to help however you need it or want it.”

She nodded, taking a sip of coffee. “Okay.”

“I’m glad that you told Dad that you were so upset last night.” Pada smiled, and as if on cue Dad walked into the kitchen now in some comfortable clothes. She was sure that he had been listening on the stairs so he didn’t interrupt them -- something that he would do.

“I’m proud that you did that,” Dad agreed as he went for coffee.

“I wasn’t actually going to go to London, but I wanted to. It would have been… I don’t know,” she let out a heaving sigh. “It was like… it’s just like everyone is a step ahead of me and I feel like I should be there.”

“You know there’s no timeline on getting it together. I was in my thirties when I realized my dream with Recovery and Pada opened the studio in their twenties with Auntie Marly. Uncle Reggie didn’t go to get his degree until he was in his mid to late twenties. There’s no right or wrong way of doing things,” Dad assured her as he shuffled over to the table.

Teddy agreed with that statement but it didn’t make her feel any better. If only she could reject mainstream ideas about fulfillment easier than she liked to pretend she could. It didn’t help when everyone around you seemed to have their lives together. Everyone seemed to be doing what they wanted and had good platonic and romantic relationships. Teddy probably had regressed back to being fifteen or sixteen. A type of teen she never really was.

It also felt stupid and whiny to complain when she had so much damn support around her. Most of the other people in group didn’t have good home lives or their parents/guardians didn’t quite understand or even try to understand. Dad and Pada and everyone else did. She also still had a job to go back to after imploding in late September. There was a roof over her head after blowing most of her saving on partying. She was fucking lucky.

“It’s a new year annwyl, a metaphorical clean slate.” Dad took a sip of his coffee. “You can do with it what you want.”

“You hate New Year bullshit.” Teddy snickered at her usually cynical Dad. Though her cynical dad did just spend the night watching over her to make sure she stayed safe and was okay.

“He loves lists though,” Pada pointed out to her. “I’ll make pancakes?” They asked, standing up.

Both Teddy and Dad immediately said yes to pancakes. As they went to work, Dad stood up before ducking into the living room for a moment before stepping back in with a notebook and pen. Teddy laughed at him. “We’re making a list?”

“We’re making a list.” Dad tore out a page in the notebook. “Let’s not call them resolutions.”

“Those suck,” Pada said as they opened the fridge. “Teddy’s Badass List For Tackling the New Year.”

Teddy laughed but didn’t hate it, so Dad wrote the title at the top of the page.

“Number one?”

“Ah, make new friends slash get to know people from group better.” Teddy scraped her teeth over her bottom lip as she watched Dad write. As he did she thought over the next one carefully. “Er, date new people and when I say date I don’t mean shag after getting high or feeling intensely lonely.”

Dad raised his eyebrows and Pada made an affirmative noise. “I’m just gonna put date new people.”

Teddy laughed, nodding in agreement. “That’s fine.”

“Three?”

“Save more money, like get my account back to what it was.” The amount of savings that she had lost during her brief party phase made Teddy cringe.

“Smart.” Dad continues to scribe for her.

“Mm, start uni in the fall.”

“Which you will.”

She agreed in hopes that it was what she wanted. The more she thought about it, the more that Teddy thought about and researched her program, the better that she felt about what she was doing. The other day she watched all of the video projects she had done in school and all the times she put stuff together for friends and family. It made her feel amazing to see what she could do.

“What’s next piccolina?” Pada questioned.

Teddy shrugged. “I don’t know, I think that’s it now.”

“That’s a good list.” Dad slid it over to her with a smile. “I think you’re going to be able to do it.”

“I hope so.” Teddy bit her lip, resting her head on her hand. “Last year started off so good,” she commented thinking about waking up next to Jordan in a hotel room. They had gone to London for a concert, and then had an amazing night together. They had talked all night, making plans about the year to come -- how they were going to explore their plans together. Now Teddy was starting the New Year without him, and without any types of plans that they had dreamt up together.

“365 days, that’s a lot of time to work on your goals.” Pada stirred the bowl in front of them, glancing over to Teddy. “You have plenty of support to help you along.”

“I know.” It was just going to be strange to do this all on her own… well not all on her own because she did have support like Pada had said. She really meant without Jordan. Everything from now on was without Jordan, and she wasn’t even sure if she could be in contact with him at all outside of when he was at family events that Teddy’s Aunts and Uncles encouraged him to join.

This year was going to be for her to conquer what she wanted to conquer. 


	7. Chapter 7

By the start of March, Teddy decided to start a Youtube channel, something she always wanted to do but she was never sure about it. It was going to be a way at working on her skills while having some fun. Her first video was an artsy style vlog of a day at the studio, lots of images of footwork and hand positions. The music was just a bunch of lovely lofi beats with some nice edits and transitions. Teddy was having a great time with it, and shooting random things, making random videos. She had a good amount of subscribers, one of which was Jordan who commented on each of her videos. That was something she attempted  _ not _ to notice because she was trying not to acknowledge him. 

Life was going well. Things were a bit odd, as she was attempting to adjust to life without slipping into self pity and feeling lonely. She was trying her best to stay focused on her goals that she set at the start of the year. The hanging out with her new friends was going strong, and they had some sober fun often. Teddy was also spending time with her family, and her relationship with her parents felt better. She was saving money at a good clip by working at the studio and picking up time at Recovery. The most important part was getting into Hogwarts to continue her studies, and she was going to start in September.

The last part of her list that Teddy had not started to work on was starting to date. But she felt ready now. Libby kept dropping hints that her old mate was still interested in Teddy, but Teddy wasn’t interested in ruining that possible connection with Libby. She didn’t want to lose one of her new good mates. So, she downloaded some new hip queer version of Tinder and Grinder called Diagonally. It didn’t seem very revolutionary because she had got two unsolicited dick pics already. One was nice but that’s not the point…

Speaking of dick pics, make it three. Teddy was about to send something sassy back to the bloke, but Dad leaned over the counter. “You know if we’re gonna bake together -- Is that a dick pic?”

Teddy screeched and Pada jumped up from where they were sitting at their laptop. “YES! Someone sent one to me. Bloody third one on this thing.” She huffed, setting the phone down.

Pada couldn’t stop laughing as they wrapped their arm around Dad.

“You know Auntie Dorky used to send a picture of holding a knife against a hot dog sausage for every dick pic she got when we were younger.”

“Let me see! Is it vile?” Pada poked Teddy.

“Sirius!” Dad nudged them with his elbow before adding the vanilla to their cake mix. Teddy rolled her eyes at them. “Tell us something that doesn’t have to do with penises, annwyl.”

Teddy hopped up on to the counter. “Well, I’ve been chatting with this bloke.”

“Show me!” Pada jumped up and down, letting go of Dad.

“No! You’ll grab my phone and look for penis pics.” Teddy kicked her feet out so Pada couldn’t get any closer to her. “But we’ve been talking and I’m thinking about asking him if he wants to go to open mic night Friday.” 

She had been chatting with Mark for a few days now, one of the few people she had had any interest in. He had not been weird and creepy, so that was a very nice draw. It was also fun chatting with him because he seemed smart and witty. Teddy liked that he was just a tad bit older than her with a job as an editor.

“That’s exciting!” Dad sounded a little too positive, but he was trying his best to be there for Teddy.

“That will be a good time, right? I’m sure it’ll be fun. Has he sent you a dick pic yet?”

Teddy rolled her eyes as Dad handed her the bowl to fold on some strawberries. “No, he has been very gentlemanly and hasn’t even been suggestive at all. We’ve had some witty banter about movies and books music.”

“Is he hot?” Pada’s eyebrow went up.

She huffed as she carefully folded the strawberries into the cake mix, trying not to turn them into complete mush. Mark was tall, as tall as her and that was nice. Plus he was handsome, so fucking handsome. “Yes, he is.”

“Can I please see a picture, Teddy? I need to know who my child is dating.” Pada pleaded with huge puppy dog eyes.

“No!” She handed the bowl back to Dad. “Plus, you said I’m free to make my own choices. I don’t need your approval.”

“They just want to ogle him like some pervy old person.” Dad got the bundt tin down.

Pada stuck their tongue out at him. “You’re the pervy old man.”

Teddy groaned as dramatic as she could, throwing her head back. “I don’t want to hear any of this. I’d rather neither of you be pervs,” she said but knew they were just giving each other a hard time.

“Really though annwyl, I’m happy you’re seeing someone new.”

She bit her lip. “I’m a little worried because I’ve never dated. It’s just… when you’re fifteen it’s not the same as dating as an adult.”

Dad nodded as he poured the batter into the tin. “I was rubbish at dating, hated it.”

“I’ve heard your first meeting story.” Teddy laughed as Pada moved to the fridge.

“He was horrible at it, well the lead up to it. The actual date was perfect.”

“Just know this bloke is probably just as nervous as you are.”

“I was bloody nervous before our first date because your Dad was so perfect on the phone, and we had this connection. I didn’t know if it would translate.” Pada pulled out a soda.

“Obviously it did.” Teddy watched the way that Dad’s eyes went all soft. One day she’d have someone look like that when thinking about their time together.

“Yes, and even if this guy isn’t it then there’s plenty of other people out there for you. Anyone would be lucky to have you — we have to approve first though.”

She rolled her eyes, grabbing the mixing bowl. “What a sap.”

“Piccolina, you’re so fantastic you know I’m right. They have to be worthy of your amazingness.”

She scraped her finger along the edge of the bowl to catch some of the mix that was left behind. “Well you’re not meeting him on our first date.”

Dad chuckled. “I’ll try to keep your Pada away.”

Nearly choking on their soda, Pada held their hand up. “Oi! As if you’re not overprotective, Remus John Lupin-Black.”

“I haven’t a clue what you’re talking about, my pearl.”

Teddy laughed as she set the bowl in the sink. “I need to go edit my new video. You’re both just the right amount of protective.”

They were, and Teddy thanked her lucky fucking stars for it everyday. If they didn’t have her back then her whole life would have changed completely back in September for good. It was taking a whole lot but she was nearly there in terms of rebuilding her foundations. Hopefully this date would help her open up even more to new things.

Mark eagerly accepted Teddy’s date suggestion, offering to pick her up for dinner before going to the open mic night at the bar. He was even encouraging about bringing her newly bought camera with her to shoot any good acts. That was a good sign that he was supportive of her interests, she thought. Not to mention he watched her videos. It was thrilling when someone complimented her on what she loved to do.

Friday came, and Teddy was happy when her parents had gone out to buy some supplies to make their own pizza as well as pick up wine instead of hanging around at home waiting for Mark to arrive. She was nervous as she got ready, but at least Pada wasn’t going to be spying out the window or something ridiculous. Dating was such a strange concept. Couldn’t they just know one another for a long time and suddenly be together and it’d be cool?

After calling Libby, Jake, Oliver and Ainsley to decompress over the impending date (and go get them to confirm she looked good and her outfit was right) she tried to get a hold of Ro, but she seemed to be MIA. It didn’t matter though because the doorbell rang, which Teddy found adorable for some reason. Like, he didn’t just wait in the car and text  _ I’m here _ .

Clattering down the stairs in the boots with the clear heels she nearly fought Pada over, Teddy was feeling pretty good. Black tights under a black skirt and an artfully ripped up band tee was the perfect mix of cool and casual. Not to mention her well worn leather jacket to top it off. She was glad they weren’t going anywhere fancy because that was too much pressure.

As she opened the door, she found Mark standing there smiling with his perfect teeth. They were almost too perfect and Teddy thought of Jordan’s one little crooked tooth that managed to break free after his braces came off.  _ No Jordan thoughts, _ she scolded herself as she greeted Mark. “Hey!”

“All right? Nice to properly meet you.” Mark smiled before gesturing to his car. “Ready?”

Just as she replied Pada and Dad’s car turned onto the street. Teddy honestly thought about dragging Mark to the car and ignoring them, but she didn't move fast enough because before they even stepped off the front steps the car pulled up. Teddy could see Pada scrambling out of the car.

“Your parents?” Mark asked as they started toward his car parked on the side of the street. To do this they had to walk towards her parents.

She nodded. “Sorry, thought we managed to get out before they got home.” Teddy hoped and prayed that they wouldn’t make it too weird.

Pada nearly skipped over too them as Dad looked to be getting the shopping bags. “Hi, you must be… Mark.” Pada’s face did something odd that Teddy couldn’t place.

“Yeah you — ah, oh.” Mark looked between Pada and Dad as Dad got closer. “Yeah.”

Dad paled before taking a deep breath, shifting the bags in his hands. “Hi, sorry to… to interrupt.”

Teddy looked between the three with a pinched brow. They were all too busy staring at one another to apparently notice Teddy. “What the fuck is happening?” Was Mark some serial killer or some shit?

“Hmm? Nothing, Teddy.” Dad’s smile was forced. “So dinner and open mic?”

Pada let out a strange laugh, looking at Dad now. They kept biting at their lip and fidgeting.

“Yep, yes,” Mark managed time to speak before looking at Teddy. “Ready?”

“Not until you all tell me what the fuck is going on.” They clearly knew each other somehow. “What the fuck?”

“Remember when my car got backed into? The other one before this one? It was him.”

Mark nodded quickly with wide eyes and Pada made a strange noise. “Right, fucked up your Dad’s car. This is just super awkward.”

Teddy shook her head because that seemed like complete bullshit. “It’s something else, what?”

Pada finally spoke up, “That’s all. Silly, really.”

“That’s not it.”

“That’s it!” Dad agreed in an oddly pitched voice.

Teddy frowned. “Promise me?”

Pada and Dad stared at one another for a moment. They didn’t lie to Teddy, honesty was their policy because they expected it from Teddy. “Ah, you remember our conversation in Italy?”

Her eyes widened and she blushed thinking about blurting out how she knew her parents were into kinky shit. Then how she asked Pada for advice because she was intrigued. But what did that have to do with Mark? Did they like, see him at some store buying kinky things? “Yeah.”

“Well, there’s a… a place you can go and there’s other people. It’s a club, well lounge maybe more like, right, Rem?” Pada’s eyes were boring into Dad, and poor Mark looked like he wanted to die.

“Oh god you met at some kinky sex club!?” Teddy yelped then clamped a hand over her mouth. Hopefully none of the neighbors heard that because it was embarrassing enough between the four of them. “The first person I’m dating since — oh my god you know each other from — Jesus Christ.” She squeezed her eyes shut as if that was going to make it go away.

“We probably shouldn’t…” Mark trailed off.

“No! Nope, I’m sorry you’re probably a decent bloke but I can’t.” Teddy waved her hands in the direction of the three of them before turning in her heel and heading back into the house. She wanted to just curl into a ball and try that all again without finding out her date had met her parents at a fucking kinky bar.

She wanted to bleach her brain when she thought about what on earth they had seen to even make them act so awkward with each other. Fuck. Being single was far more preferable to dating someone who had possibly seen her parents in positions she dare not say or think.

Falling on to the sofa, Teddy shoved her face into the cushion and screamed. When she popped her head back up Pada stood nearby now holding the shopping. “Soooo… think of it this way: your next date has GOT to be better than this one.”

“UNLESS THEY ALSO GO TO A KINKY SEX CLUB TOO!” She went to scream into the cushion again.

“Okay, that’s true but highly unlikely. Maybe just show me a picture next time.” Pada let out a strangled laugh as Teddy sat up.

“Oh my god fine. Jesus.” Teddy rubbed her face. “Where’s Dad? Buying me bleach to forget this whole fiasco?”

“Ah, no, ice cream. It’s probably a bit easier on the stomach.”

Teddy folded forward, wrapping her arms around her legs. “My parents go to sex clubs where they meet my dates. That’d be a good video but it’s far too embarrassing.”

“Maybe you can say it happened to your friend! Oh, make it into a skit!”

“Maybe when I can relive it without remembering my parents go to a sex club.” Teddy groaned.

“I’m not sure what to say to that. I’m going to just put the groceries away. There should be enough for you if you want or you could call Dad to pick up something for you.”

Teddy just groaned again, this was not how her night was meant to go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Interesting to see what happened with Sirius, Remus and Mark? Check out the Older Teddy One Shots from Sirius and Remus' point of view-- entitled "Mark"


	8. Chapter 8

The mortification of Mark having seen (yes, seen, just seen was enough to deal wit,h he would not believe it was more than that) Teddy’s parents one night at a sex club was wearing off towards the last week of March. He had started chatting with a girl named Beth and a guy named Leo. Begrudgingly he has shown their photos to Pada to make sure that there would be no surprises as his first non date with Mark. Teddy did his best to not linger on it, even if Mark seemed fucking lovely.

Tonight was a brand new night, he thought as he cuffed his jeans. Take two for dinner and open mic night but this time with Beth. Then next week he was going to go to some fancy museum event with Leo. Now though he was rushing to get out of the studio to meet Beth at the restaurant. As he tried to tame his hair Pada came into the back room with a big grin on their face.

“Excited?”

“Nervous but it’s just a date.” Teddy had to remind himself that. It wasn’t as if they were getting married after one go. He gave his hair one more once over, missing how he used to dye it. But that was the old Teddy. Now he was grown up Teddy. Or attempting to grow up Teddy. Whatever it was, but whatever it was was terrifying.

“Right, have fun and relax.” Pada crosses their arms. “You should have worn your purple Docs. A pop of color.”

Teddy looked at his all black outfit in the mirror, his well worn boots looked fine to him. “Pada.”

They nodded. “Right right, looking properly punk. This is the lass with the eyebrow piercing, right?”

“Yeah, don’t tell me you remember her suddenly.” Teddy’s tone was sarcastic but he did have a slight panic.

“No! No everyone goes to the BDSM club.” Pada shook their head. “Off you go. I’ll get your things and bring them home.”

“Thanks Pada.” He took a deep breath before hugging them.

“Have a great time piccolino, Dad and I will probably wait up.”

“Nosy bastards,” he said lovingly before patting his hand over his pockets to check for his phone and wallet.

“Love you.”

“Love you too, Pada.” Teddy smiled before taking off, out of the studio. He ignored Auntie Marly’s shrieking when he jetted past the front desk and out the doors.

By the time he got to the restaurant, Teddy’s nerves disappeared. The walk in the cool late March air did wonders to clear his head, and make him excited for the night. It was just a date like he said, he didn’t need to fall in love or even want a second one. If it worked out then it worked out and that would be fantastic. If it didn’t then Teddy would bitch about it to his friends and parents. Plus, what could be worse than his date having gone to the same BDSM club as your parents?

When he walked into the restaurant, Teddy nearly asked for a table, but he saw Beth at the bar. Her black hair pulled back into a high pony wearing a little black dress and leaning against the bartop taking a shot. Teddy frowned because that couldn’t bode well for the night. But, he thought, maybe she was nervous and trying to calm down. Though with Teddy not using alcohol or drugs or sex to numb things, he wasn’t sure that it was good either way. Sure a glass of wine or a beer or a cocktail would be fine but downing a shot seemed a bit much at the moment for him.

“Teddy! Hi hun!” Her voice was far too loud for the din of the restaurant.

Teddy did his best not to cringe, he had to give this a try. Over the phone she had seemed so chill and relaxed. In front of him she was wound up and loud. And she reeked of vodka when she hugged him. “Hi Beth.”

“You look so cute, oh god.” She looked him up and down, not being shy about it.

“Ah, yeah? You look nice too.” Teddy breathed a sigh of relief when she pulled back.

“Let’s do a shot!”

“Oh, I’m not drinking.” He shook his head, not really interested in explaining why he wasn’t drinking, but he knew it was coming.

“Why not!?”

Teddy shrugged. “I don’t want to.”

Beth asked why again before ordering two shots, and Teddy bit back an annoyed sigh. 

“I’ll go get a table then?” Teddy ignored her insisting and went to ask to be seated. Leaving now would have felt sort of like giving up, even if the date didn’t seem to be a bust. He needed to  _ try _ . Trying was the name of the game, maybe it’d get better and she’d settle in and they would have a decent conversation.

When she stumbled over to Teddy, doing that sort of walk where someone was trying to pretend they weren’t drunk, he nearly just slipped out the door. It was  _ right there _ . Really he probably should have done it because things did not get better when they sat down and she insisted on a bottle of wine immediately.

“I don’t drink much and I’m not interested tonight.” Teddy fiddled with the edge of his menu, looking across at Beth, who was already skimming through looking for something to eat.

“I know! I know! It’s fine.” She waved him off. “Boring, but fine.”

Well, that was it. Teddy set his menu down, looking around him. He was going to look like an arse for leaving, but she just couldn’t let it go. She was nothing like she presented online outside of how she looked. Was this the opposite of catfishing? Didn’t that involve using good looking pictures?

“It’s not boring, it’s how I feel. I’m not saying you can’t but I don’t want to. Did you maybe think I might have a drinking problem? I don’t, I did have a substance abuse problem with other things.” Teddy rubbed his face.

“You’re an addict?”

“ _ No _ ,” Teddy said standing up. “Not that I would be ashamed if I were an addict, but you’re -- you shouldn’t be forcing drinks on someone when they say no. No means no, no matter the bloody situation.”

Beth scrambled up, knocking over the water on the table. It crashed to the floor bringing the attention of everyone around in the room right to them. Teddy felt bad for a moment as the lady who had seated them and a man came towards them, but that disappeared when Beth doubled over and got sick in Teddy’s shoes. 

Not embarrassing at all, Teddy heard the sarcastic voice in his head. How could two dates go so terribly wrong with them both barely getting started? The time to ponder that was not now as they were being escorted out of the restaurant. Teddy was thankful it wasn’t one of his favorite places then it would have been even worse.

“Oh god, I’m so sorry!” Beth started to cry when they were outside. “I’m sorry I was so nervous.” Tears were streaking down her cheeks, making her mascara run.

He just shook his head, digging his phone out of his pocket. “I’m having a hard time feeling sorry when you just got sick in my favorite Docs. I’m going to call you an Uber then I’m going to walk home because I need to clear my head.”

This caused Beth to cry more. “I’m sorry I went through a shitty break up and I was so nervous.” She choked out a sob.

“I’m sorry about that.” Just as Teddy was about to confirm the Uber a car stopped in front of the restaurant.

“Teddy?” Auntie Alice rolled her window down and he had never been more relieved to see one of his family members — no that was a lie because he thought of seeing Dad and Pada for the first time after everything. But he was still thrilled to see her.

“Oh god. I’m meant to be on a date but things didn’t go well.” Teddy poked his head into the car.

“I got drunk be — before he even got here and got sick in his shoes.” She let out another cry.

Auntie Al pulled a face before glancing at Beth. “Can I — do you need a ride home, sweetie?”

Beth sniffled behind Teddy. “Really?”

“Yes, you should get home safe, right Teds?”

He nodded. “I need to take my shoes off if I’m getting in your car.”

“Ah, hang on!” She opened her door before going around to the back. “I got a couple of bags. You know how Neville and Uncle Frank get car sick.”

Teddy nodded before looking at his boots finally. They weren’t too bad, and he could undo the laces without it being gross. He was just going to hose them off in the garden later.

Once Teddy sorted his shoes into a bag, and Auntie Al gave Beth another to prevent any further mishaps, they were on their way. Teddy was thankful for quiet, knowing that Auntie Al would embarrass anyone. Thank god it wasn’t Auntie Marly who pulled up.

He decided to text Dad and Pada to let them know he was going to be home early. It was possible that Pada wasn’t even home yet.

_ TLDR: date was drunk when I arrived, caused a scene, got sick on my shoes, and Auntie Al stumbled upon said disaster. Be home early _

**_Oh no_ **

_ Oh yes _

**_On the phone with Pada, they’re stopping for ice cream and we’ll watch a movie_ **

🙌🏼🙌🏼

Teddy tucked his phone away as they pulled up to Beth’s building. He helped pour her out of the car then walked up to her door to leave her with a very bewildered roommate. When Teddy explained the situation she seemed unsurprised. At least she didn’t have a go at him for anything, Teddy thought as he got back into Auntie Alice’s car.

“You’re basically my fairy godmother.” Teddy buckled his seatbelt.

“That’s good because I am your favorite godmother.” She winked before pulling away. “Don’t worry, I can take Auntie Marly.”

“She’s feisty and Auntie Dorky is scary.”

Auntie Al waved her hand. “Ha, I am the most murdery of them all, Teds. I got it all in hand.” She paused for a moment, going through an intersection. “I’m assuming dating post-Jordan has been strange?”

“This is my second try and both times did not make it to even ordering dinner.” He rested his head against the seat.

“I’m sorry, sweetie. Dad mentioned something about a car accident last time?”

Teddy groaned, deciding to go with that lie to reduce talking about his parents’ sex life with his aunt. “Yeah it was awkward because my date had been the one to wreck Dad’s car. He didn’t even want to do dinner.”

“Not worth it then. Neither was that girl.” She gestured behind her.

“I sympathize to a point, but  _ yikes _ .” Teddy understood breaking up with someone you loved and how life could just make you lose it, but to his knowledge he didn’t throw up on anyone’s shoes.

“Yikes indeed.” Auntie Al sighed. “There’s someone out there for you, don’t worry.”

Teddy knew she was right, he just hoped to actually make it through a date or two.


	9. Chapter 9

The next week Teddy was mentally preparing for her date with Leo. Third time had to be the charm. Ro had even texted back this time saying the vibes she was getting about this one were better than the other two. Maybe this time she’d have an actual conversation with her date instead of an awkward goodbye or a drunken cry.

To ease her nerves she decided to film herself getting ready for the date; more of a vlog than any sort of makeup tutorial because those were more fun to edit. Her YouTube channel was seeing a nice steady climb in followers as she was constantly posting content. Doing this thing she loved helped her stay focused. 

Halfway through putting her makeup on, her phone lit up with a group video chat from Libby, Oliver, Jake, and Ainsley. They were some of her biggest cheerleaders since starting the channel. “I’m getting ready!” Teddy set her phone so it was angled for her to see the screen as she worked on her eyeshadow.

“You look great!” Ainsley said in her usual sweet voice.

“Have you vetted this one? I offered to stalk his socials.” Oliver raised an eyebrow.

“You're terrible.” Teddy’ sarcasm dripped through, though it was appealing. She probably should have let him.

“I let Oliver check out Rhea, and she’s amazing.” Jake sounded just as lovestruck as he had for the last few weeks over his girlfriend. Teddy was only a little bit jealous.

“Teddy, I’m telling you my cousin is great!” Libby was still trying to push that but Teddy wasn’t going to bite. If it ruined their friendship, then Teddy wasn’t sure how she’d get over it. Since dealing with some shitty people, she cherished her good friends.

“ _ Lib! _ ” Teddy rolled her eyes, looking for her eyeliner. A sharp wing felt needed with her dress today. 

Sadly the flowy navy dress with gold foiling of constellations couldn’t be styled with combat boots and ripped tights since this was a somewhat posh event. It wasn’t as if Leo was rich or anything, he was interning at the Gringott Museum of Fine Art. Due to this he was invited to the new exhibition opening on the history of suffragist fashion. Since Teddy loved fashion and rebellion, she eagerly jumped on it as they were trying to figure out what to do for a date.

“She won’t throw up on your shoes.”

“Hopefully this bloke won’t either,” Oliver commented while Jake pulled a face and Ainsley snorted.

“Thanks for encouragement,” she said blandly as she turned side to side trying to decide if the wings were even enough. Of course they were, she could probably do them blindfolded.

“You’re bound to meet someone decent.” Libby pulled her curly hair back into a bun.

“Let’s hope this one is decent. I’m not looking for a proposal but an actual conversation and maybe sharing a laugh or two would be nice.” Teddy grabbed her ruby red lipstick. “We’re going to a museum… it’s can’t be fucking terrible, can it?”

Teddy shouldn’t have said that because she jinxed herself. Or the universe hated her — either one. It all started when Pada broke out the  _ your chariot awaits _ when they were seeing her off. Her head went right to Jordan and all the times that she went off to dances or fancy anniversary dates with him. That was stupid to think of, but she couldn’t stop the thoughts of Jordan that randomly popped into her head. Four years together, so many different moments or sayings or objects would make her think of him.

At least Leo was not drunk, nor did her parents recognize him when they looked at a photo (which she couldn’t get over having to do). He was dressed nicely, and the only traces of hipster or alt — however he wanted to spin it — on him was his sleeve of various art supplies peeking out from under the cuff of his jacket and the triangle septum ring. The music he had on was a good mix as well, so he earned points from Teddy there.

“I love The Weird Sisters.” She turned a little in her seat as they got closer to the museum.

“They’re brilliant, aren’t they? I’ve seen them live.”

“Yeah? Maybe we’ve been at similar shows then. I think me and my friends have gone to nearly every show since we were fourteen.” Teddy laughed as she thought about the hickey Vic had given her at the first show. That was ridiculous.

“Like our paths crossed in some tragic novel type way?”

Groaning, Teddy shook her head. “God, I hope it’s not a tragedy.”

“No, though most good ones have some tragedy in them.”

“Maybe we should stop talking about tragedy on our first date?” Teddy let out a big bit of a strangled laugh. She did not need any tragedy, thank you very much.

Thankfully they changed the subject back to music, where Teddy could spend hours talking about. 

The drive didn’t take much longer anyhow, and they arrived at Gringotts, which was on the edge of downtown, skirting the richer suburb of the city. Teddy loved going to the museum, she spent a lot of time there with Luna before she went off to uni in France. Tonight, it was only opened to patrons and staff along with their guests. Luna, not the jealous type, was far more excited for Teddy than anything.

As exciting as the event was, Teddy couldn’t help but think she was out of place. Everyone around her looked rich and important. She got a few looks — probably for being too tall or because they thought she wasn’t feminine enough. Those looks wouldn’t have bothered her much if she had been in a different situation. Here she didn’t feel like herself, nor did she know anyone but Leo, so she felt itchy in her own skin.

At least he seemed nice enough, and wasn’t getting sick on her shoes. Their conversation was good too. Leo’s knowledge about art really shone through as he showed her around some of the open galleries before the big announcement. That was all until the night took a sharp turn.

About a half hour in, they had managed a glass of champagne and canapés. The exhibition has officially opened after a short speech from the curator as well. She was thrilled to have an actual date, but Teddy started to notice that Leo kept looking at two different people. They didn’t seem to be together, but they were getting his attention.

“What’s going on?” Teddy asked when they were looking at a hat belonging to Emmeline Pankhurst. She’d much rather be talking about the hat but a bloke with blonde hair and shirt one size too small walked by, and Leo had wrapped an arm around Teddy’s waist a little too possessively for her liking. This was one of the people that Leo kept looking at since they got in.

“Nothing. Come here, they have a pin over here that was found in an attic of some random flat the other year.” Leo started to lead her in the direction of the pin.

She furrowed her brow, slipping out of his embrace because they were not even close to being there. Sure they had decent conversation, but they weren’t at the stage where hands could be on bodies for Teddy. Plus, he hadn’t even asked.

When they got closer to where Leo was taking her she saw the blond bloke and the other person Leo kept glancing at all night. An older woman who had a very artsy vibe with her black dress and red cat eye glasses. The two weren’t interacting, but they were both close enough to the pin for Teddy to notice. More alarms went off when Leo’s hand settled on the small of her back.

Leo was babbling on about the pin, but Teddy couldn’t stop wondering what was going on. When Leo glanced over his shoulder then his hand slid down to her arse she yelped and jumped back. How was it that for the second date in a row everyone was looking at her?

“This is just ah… an interesting pin.” She managed to speak loud enough for people to hear before taking Leo’s hand and pulling him in the direction of a quieter spot. “What is happening?”

Leo rubbed the back of his neck. “Nothing… okay, maybe my exes are here.”

“Exes? Multiple? Plural?”

“Yeah, it’s not a big deal.”

She leaned in closer in an attempt not to raise her voice. Leo took this as an opportunity because with one more look to the side he  _ kissed _ her. 

“You fucking dick, if I hadn’t just made an arse out of myself when you groped me I’d slap you.” Teddy pushed Leo back. “Are you trying to show them you’re totally over them because it’s not fucking working,” Teddy whisper yelled, pointing a finger at his chest.

Leo, his brows drawn together and mouth open, held up his hands. “I’m not — I thought you were going in for a kiss.”

“Yeah because I’m super turned on by showing off to your exes!” She waved her hand around. “God, why can’t I get one decent date?” She looked up to the high vaulted ceiling. Why was this happening to her every fucking date? Well not this exactly but disaster.

“We can—“

Teddy’s sharp laugh was a little louder than she meant for it to be. “No, we are not doing anything. You touched me twice without consent then kissed me without any too and I was in the middle of shouting at you. No wonder you have two exes who don’t seem to want to give you the time of day!”

Without waiting for Leo to respond, Teddy turned on her heel and went for the entrance. This was ridiculous. The universe needed to stop being such a fucking dick when she was trying her hardest to find that person who was right for her. Or at least decent enough to date. Instead she was getting men who her parents knew, drunk sad girls getting over bad breakups, and creepy blokes trying to show off to their exes.

Out there somewhere there had to be someone for Teddy, and right now she couldn’t help thinking that it was Jordan. But she also didn’t like subscribing to the thought process that there was only one person out there for her. Sitting around and wishing and hoping for Jordan to be there was just as bad as Leo showing off for his exes. Not to mention Jordan broke her heart. He didn’t deserve to have it back. Did he?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remus and Sirius are interrupted from their own date night when Teddy gets in early. Check out You're Home Early in the Older Teddy One Shots


	10. Chapter 10

Even as the weather changed and turned brighter and warmer, Teddy’s attempts at dating stayed in the category of complete shit. By the end of May she had seemed to rack up enough dates that sucked in order to win a prize. God she wished she won something good for putting up with all this bullshit.

Following the Leo debacle, she went out with Nikki, who seemed fine enough. Teddy even went back to her flat because she was really dying to get off and Nikki wasn’t the worst date by a long shot. Then it came to sex and Nikki cried when Teddy tried to go down on her because she kissed her hip like her ex did? She tried to wave it off, but Teddy wasn’t feeling it no matter how hard she tried. Nikki's tears really just put a damper on the mood.

Then came Anthony, who was confused at Teddy not being a girl. He kept asking why he was masc and not wearing heels even though Teddy made it perfectly clear in his profile he was genderqueer. Teddy trudged through dinner, but left shortly after with dysphoria rearing it’s nasty head. Pada really came through with the comfort in that one, and Teddy felt so much better after spending some time with them talking through things. It was so strange because Jordan had never made him like that. He had only tried to make sure Teddy felt good.

Tonight he was attempting one more date before deciding if he should take a break from the app. Libby was still going on about her cousin, and Teddy was still brushing it off. The only things he knew about her was that she was trans, her name was Skye, and she had seen a picture of Teddy on Instagram and said he was cute. She was also Libby’s cousin and it’d be strange, wouldn’t it?

Hopefully that wouldn’t matter because he had a date with Cameron. A grad student at Hogwarts studying sociology. He seemed sweet, but Teddy knew better than to judge what he saw via texts and phone calls. No reassurance from his parents or friends could change his mind that it all could be complete shit. Ro had even texted that his night was going to go well and he needed to accept what came. She was normally right but just couldn’t bring himself to believe it.

Cameron looked like his photo — shorter than Teddy, a shy smile, and deep brown eyes — and wasn’t drunk when he met him at the door. That was two pluses. But it was still early, so Teddy had his guard up when they were sat by the window.

“This is a nice place, have you been before?” Cameron looked around the modern, very aesthetic restaurant.

“No, actually. My friend recommended it.” Ro wouldn’t stop talking about it when Luna and she had gone the other week. It was also probably not a place that Jordan would go because the menu didn’t seem to fit his usual taste.

“That’s great, your friend sounds smart like you.” Cameron smiled at the table across from Teddy.

That was weird. Maybe he was just awkward at first. “Ha… thanks.”

“I feel this spark between us, right?” Cameron gestured with his menu.

“Ah…” Teddy was thankful when the server cleared her throat.

“Hi! I’m Skye, I'll be serving you tonight.”

Teddy’s head turned a bit too fast to find a tall girl in a black button up shirt and black jeans. Her pastel purple hair was pulled back into a braid out of her face. Skye wasn’t a popular name… “Skye?”

“Oh my god, Teddy, right? Libby’s mate?”

The universe was a bastard, Teddy thought. “Yeah! You’re the cousin she keeps telling me about.”

Skye’s cheeks pinked and Cameron butted in, “I’ll have a martini with two olives.” It was as if he did not want to acknowledge that Teddy and Skye were talking.

“I watch your channel, it’s great.” Skye smiled. “What can I get you to drink?”

“Do you carry Lowlander?” Teddy asked because he hadn’t even looked at the menu. He wanted a beer, but was still doing his best not to drink a lot so non-alcoholic beers were the best he could do.

“We do. One martini and one Lowlander coming right up.” She nodded before heading off.

“You two know one another?” Cameron questioned Teddy.

“No, not really, just through her cousin.” Teddy scraped his teeth over her bottom lip. Great, now he was the one fucking up the date.

That thought didn’t last very long as Cameron started to ramble about soul mates after getting their drinks and placing their orders. “I read about finding your other half and then we matched, you know?”

Teddy’s eyes widened. He could not be going where Teddy thought he was going— could he? “Oh… um...no.”

Cameron laughed, shaking his head as if Teddy had done something endearing. “I’m saying that it’s meant to be. Our signs match —“

“Did you do my birth chart then?” He snickered because he was fairly certain this guy was just really bullshitting.

“Your what?”

“You don’t know what a birth chart is but you think our signs are compatible?” Teddy raised an eyebrow.

“Yes, of course. Not to mention I always dreamt I’d fall for someone with hazel eyes, they’re beautiful. I knew I saw them before when I saw your photo.” Cameron let out a dreamy sigh, leaning his elbows on the table. “And my psychic said I’d meet someone important with a name starting with T.”

“Holy shit,” Teddy muttered under his breath. This guy was completely crazy. It had to be some joke or he had some serious bad karma. “There’s lots of T names, mate.”

Cameron kept on it, even after their food arrived. Teddy needed to leave, but he didn’t know how to do without looking like an arsehole. He had enough of making scenes with other bad dates. If only he would shut up about how Teddy was his opposite, so clearly they were meant to attract.

Before Skye, who seemed to be holding back laughter each time she came to the table, could ask if they wanted dessert Teddy quickly asked for the check. He insisted on paying — if only to get the fuck as soon as possible because it had been the most excruciating meal.

“So what are you doing now?”

“Dad’s ill, got to get him some soup,” Teddy lied, tapping his foot as he looked around for Skye to bring back his card and the bill to sign.

“That’s too bad. I know a good place that has soup. We can go get it. Then maybe we can talk more.”

“Talk more?” Teddy tried not to yelp because he barely got a word in all night.

“A movie might be nice. You’ll love this German language film about—”

“I need to stay with Dad.” He insisted as Skye appeared, causing him to let out a sigh of relief. “Thanks so much.” Teddy took the little tray his card was on.

“It’s her, isn’t it?” Cameron pointed to Skye.

Teddy traded a wide eyed look with her before looking back to Cameron. “No, it’s that I’m not interested in you.” He couldn’t hold it in any longer.

Skye let out a choked noise as if she was holding back a laugh. “I’ll let you—”

“No I’m leaving.” Cameron stood up, nearly tipping his chair over in haste. “I can see that you’re interested in her. I thought I could really love you!” He stormed off, leaving Teddy staring open mouthed at his now empty seat.

“I’m… sorry?” Skye coughed, shifting her weight. “How many dates?”

Teddy threw his hands up. “That was the first one!”

The laugh Skye let out seemed to have been held in for quite a long time with how loud it was. She covered her mouth with her hand.

“Thanks for that.” Teddy slumped on his seat. “If you watch my videos then you know my dating life is complete shit. I kept finding these weirdos.” People probably thought his story times were fake, and god he wished they were.

“I’m so sorry. If I hadn’t swiped your card I’d give you this on the house. Wow.”

Teddy put his head in his hands. “Thanks, but nothing’s gonna fix this. He said he could have loved me, what the fuck is that?”

She grimaced then looked over her shoulder. “I have to get to my other tables. But, ah, sorry about all that. Anyone calls you a liar on YouTube I can tell then I witnessed this insanity first hand.” 

“Thanks, Skye.”

“Don’t worry about it. Talk to you later.” Skye gave a bit of a shy smile before heading off to another table.

When Teddy left the restaurant, he hoped that Cameron wasn’t a stalker. Thankfully the coast was clear when he got in the bus to head home. The way there, he thought over his evening. Diagonally was going in the trash because there didn’t seem to be anyone one there for him. Cameron joined the long list of bad dates, possibly moving to the top of the list. 

Then there was Skye, who Teddy found nice and attractive. What a coincidence that the cousin Libby wouldn’t shut up about worked there. It was probably Ro’s guidance from the universe since she suggested it to him. The hesitation to ask Skye on a date was still there though. Ruining a friendship because Teddy thought Skye was cute and they didn’t have an awful conversation didn’t seem like enough.

“I’m home.” Teddy announced as he closed the door behind him. Bucky greeted her with a happy bark as he came trotting over to the door. “Hey Buck.”

“Hi piccolino, how was the date?” Pada’s voice came from the living room. “You didn’t write any urgent messages tonight.”

He kicked off his shoes before padding into the living room where his parents were cuddled up on the sofa. They were so infuriatingly in love still… not that it was bad, but Teddy wanted someone to love him. “Well,” he started as he fell into the loveseat. “He was convinced we were soulmates. Told me that he could have loved me at the end of the night.”

Dad and Pada looked at one another, probably attempting to come up with something good to say to him. They seemed to be attempting to stop any laughter too.

“Go ahead, laugh away.”

At that they both burst into loud peels of laughter. “Oh Christ, I’m so sorry annwyl.” Dad managed to speak as his shoulders were still shaking.

“It was painful. I only stayed for the food.”

Pada took a deep breath, clearly trying to calm themselves down. “You poor thing. There’s people out there for you, you’re just coming out with some bad dates.”

Teddy snorted. “I deleted the app on my way home.”

“It doesn’t seem very helpful.” Remus rubbed Pada’s arm.

“I wish I knew someone for you, piccolino. But you’re going to start school in the fall, more people to meet there, right?”

He nodded, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. “You know how Libby’s told me a million times about her cousin?”

Both his parents said yes.

“Well she was our server tonight.”

“Oh?” Dad grinned.

“She was pretty, wasn’t she? I can see it all over your face.” Pada pointed at him.

“Maybe.” Teddy’s cheeks heated up. “And really nice. It’s just… I still don’t want to ruin my friendship with Libby.”

“I’m sure that’s hard.”

“So diplomatic, caro.” Pada nudged him. “I think that you could give it a try. You talked to Libby about it, right?”

“Yeah.” Teddy pulled out his phone. “She said we don’t have to get married or anything but she thinks we’d have a good time together.”

“Then maybe you can give a try.”

“Right, you never know until you try. But I get why you’re hesitant about it. The plus side, you’d probably not have the worst date of your life.”

“I would say nothing can top this one, but the universe seems to keep trying.” Teddy opened his phone. Maybe one date wouldn’t hurt. Or even just a conversation and becoming friends.

_ Hey, Lib… can I possibly have Skye’s number? _


	11. Chapter 11

“Your date’s tonight, right?” Libby asked as they sat down at their usual pizza place following group. Teddy wasn’t going as frequently as before since she was feeling a lot more grounded, but it was still good to talk every once in a while. Though she did go to pizza weekly with Libby, Oliver, Jake, and Ainsley whether she went to group or not because she liked having that time with her friends.

Over the last week Teddy had been texting back and forth with Skye, and it was going great -- but so did so many of her interactions prior to other dates. There was some hope because Teddy was sure that Libby wouldn’t suggest she date someone terrible. Plus she met Skye in person and she seemed like someone Teddy wouldn’t mind going on a date with. So maybe this time she would have a good time.

Not to mention the worry about losing this group of friends in case things didn’t work out with Skye. They were all friends before Teddy had come into the group. After the group in London who only really cared about themselves and their images, Libby, Oliver, Jake, and Ainsley were the complete opposite. The four of them, even if they were fairly different kinds of people on the outside, they were all deep down good and good friends. To lose them over a date would have been ridiculous.

“Yeah.” Teddy bit her lip, unsure if she could bring herself to say what she was thinking. After all her time in therapy and group -- along with Dad’s endless log of helpful phrases from pamphlets -- Teddy knew that talking was better. “I don’t … look, the only reason I didn’t go on a date with Skye earlier is because I like you all too much as my mates. So if things go wrong I don’t want to lose you all.”

The four looked at one another in confusion before Libby spoke up. “Do you plan on crushing her?”

Teddy frowned, knowing that people don’t plan things like that sometimes. For instance, Jordan swore never to break Teddy’s heart and yet that happened. “What happens if something does come up?”

“Unless you turn into an utter twat, I don’t think that we’re going to just get rid of you.” Oliver took a sip of his soda.

“Yeah, I don’t think you’re getting a personality transplant anytime soon.” Ainsley shook her head.

Libby huffed after pushing aside her empty plate. “Don’t worry, Skye and I talked all about it. She’s worried about the same things. So, clearly you two are on the same page.”

That made Teddy relax a little. Hopefully things wouldn’t become strained as they have been with Jordan and Teddy’s family. Losing friends for a temporary relationship would have made Teddy ridiculously upset. Hopefully everyone was right and hopefully this would all go well.

“Whatever happens it can’t be worse than all your other dates.”

Jake had a point, unless the world imploded, things couldn’t get much worse than what she had dealt with from other dates. As long as Skye hadn’t  _ met _ her parents and wasn’t drunk on arrival and didn’t try to feel her up and didn’t cry when she kissed her and didn’t question her gender and didn’t declare Teddy was her soulmate then it’d probably be fine.

When she got home after pizza to get ready for her date with Skye, she found Dad and Pada out in the garden chatting. “Hi piccolina! Nearly date night, are you excited?” Pada sat up straight on the lounger they were on.

“Actually, yeah.” Teddy went to go sit with them. She had a little before she had to get ready, so she could sit with her parents for a little. It was so nice outside, and it was good to be with them. Everything felt more stable with her parents lately. Everything seemed to be back to normal on that front.

“I’m so glad you're excited. You already met her, and it’s Libby’s cousin, so I think it bodes well for you.” Dad reached over and patted her leg.

“She's really pretty too.” Pada nudged Teddy in the side.

“Pada, she is young enough to be your daughter.” Teddy rolled her eyes, cheeks flushing because it was true.

“Pervy old person,” Dad accused half heartedly. They returned the accusation by sticking their tongue out at him.

“She is pretty, though.” Teddy bit her lip.

“So, what are you up to tonight on this date with a pretty girl?”

“Caro, that sounded very old of you.” Pada poked him and Dad rolled his eyes.

“We’re going to open mic night, something I’ve been trying to take a date there since the incident we do not speak of.” She glared at Pada because if anyone brought Mark up any deeper than that then it would be them. They just held their hands up.

“She seems more your speed. You were dating too many  _ normal _ people.” Pada nodded with a little shrug.

Dad furrowed his brow and Teddy didn’t blame him because he didn’t understand what that meant. “Okay, define normal.”

“You know, not punk or hipster or whatever. Missing colored hair and piercings and band tees.”

“Ha! Well… I guess you’re right. I do have a type, I just wanted to branch out.”

“Plus, love,” Dad declared, throwing an arm around their shoulders. “As I’ve said many times being punk is inside, not just outside.”

“Exactly, but none of the attempted dates seemed very punk on the inside either.” Teddy, whether she realized it or not, had been avoiding anyone who might vaguely remind her of Jordan. Which was strange because there was so much that she found attractive about being socially conscious, a bit rebellious, and insanely smart. It seemed like Skye had those qualities judging by her socials and their conversations over the last week. Teddy hoped it was true in person.

Soon enough Teddy arrived at the bar where her favorite open mic night was occurring. Dressed in her favorite black slip dress over a sheer polka dot top, her look was finished off with her purple Docs because her black ones were binned following Nikki getting sick on them. She found Skye sitting at a high top table not too far from the stage wearing a shirt that read  _ Hex Racists  _ with a witchy hand on it.

“I need that shirt,” Teddy declared as she took a seat across from her.

She laughed, her cheeks going a little pink. “Hi Teddy.”

“Pleasantries be damned, where is that from? You know my Grandma and aunt and cousin all practice.”

Skye raised a perfectly plucked eyebrow. “Do they hex racists?”

“I mean, probably even though they’re all about positive vibes but you can’t have positive vibes for arseholes.”

“True.” She chuckled as the waitress came over with a cider for Skye and a beer for Teddy. “It’s a Lowlander. Hope you didn’t mind me ordering for you. I was so thirsty.”

Teddy shook her head, pleased that she had remembered Teddy’s order. “No I don’t mind at all, thanks so much.”

“I’ll send you the link for the shirt later.” Skye looked over her shoulder. “There’s a guy performing that’s amazing. I heard him when they did those sessions in the park last summer.”

“Oh yeah? I went to a few of those last year.” Teddy bit her lip, trying to kick out any thoughts of Jordan. It was about nine months now since they broke up, but when his name or certain memories were brought up that hollow feeling in her chest emerged. But she wanted to move on for good.

“I’m shocked we haven’t met before because it seems like we like a lot of the same stuff.”

Teddy nodded. “Yeah, but my Dad says that things don’t happen until it’s time, so maybe it’s time we met.”

“I think so, Teddy Lupin-Black.” She winked.

The date went well, so well that she barely paid much attention to the music. They talked the whole night away, and soon it was nearly midnight. Teddy didn’t want the date to end because it was like they were clicking on so many levels that she missed when dating the past mistakes. Skye was sarcastic and well spoken. She spent time she wasn’t waitressing or costume designing for fun at a local LGBT organization and had even gushed about Pada’s work.

“That was fun,” Skye declared as they made their way to the bus stop. They both were catching the same bus as it stopped near her flat downtown before taking Teddy to the suburbs.

“We’ll have to do it again soon.” Never had she been more glad for a normal night without any stupid mishaps. “I’m so glad you’re not crazy.”

“Ha! You had some shit dates. The groping guy sounds terrible. I mean they all do. I can’t believe your parents—”

“No!” Teddy waved a hand around as they got to the stop.

She laughed, scrunching up her nose. “That’s some shit luck.”

“I know.”

“The video where you talk about Dom/sub dynamics was super interesting. You’re right, your dad does not look like the Dom.” She chuckled.

“Please do not get into that conversation if you ever happen to meet them.”

“I won’t.” Skye looked down the street for a moment. “It’s great how close you are with your parents.”

“I’m lucky even if they drive me mad. They both texted me three times asking how the date was going.”

“Three times? They must think I’m a murderer given your track record.”

“Ha, that is possible… are you?” Teddy teased, leaning into her a little closer. “If you are can you tell me your secrets before you murder me like some evil villain?”

“Sure, happy to fulfill your dying wish.” Skye bumped her hip with Teddy’s.

“That’s really nice of you.” Teddy bit her lip, happy to be able to joke with someone like this.

“Is it weird that I want to kiss you right now?”

“After talk of murder? Maybe a little but it’s probably weird that I won’t say no — in fact I’m wholeheartedly hoping that you do kiss me.” She grinned from ear to ear.

“Fantastic. Glad we can be weird together.” Skye moved a little closer to Teddy, looking up at her with a half smile.

“Love weird.” Teddy wrapped her arm around Skye’s waist as she closed the distance between their lips.

_ Oh _ , this could be good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last part of Teddy's journey starts tomorrow!


End file.
